As I’m training our current elder candidates, I’ve been significantly encouraged and sharpened by their response to the calling and qualifications of godly eldership. We’re using Strauch’s Biblical Eldership and Bob Thune’s adapted, gospel influenced Study Guide (forthcoming) as a general guide to our training. While these tools are certainly helpful, what has been most significant is gathering with men who care about the deep things of life. As we meet, we’re collectively cultivating a centrist manliness that is neither hyper-masculine nor hyper-feminine but deeply biblical and Jesus-shaped. I sense a “third view” of evangelical manliness emerging from our discussions. Here are few highlights from our time so far.
Gravity and Joy in the Call
Our very first meeting was marked with a gravity and earnestness about being deep men, husbands, and fathers. We went around the table and shared our fears and hopes about the call of elder. I was struck by how seriously these men weighed the call and how personally they embraced the process. Regardless of the outcome, we all agreed that this process would make us better human beings, men, and leaders for our families and church. This really set the tone for a training that is deeply relational not merely theological. This tone has carried over into all our discussions. We leave each 6-7:30am time challenged, inspired, and often changed. I take notes throughout.
Centrist Masculinity Clears Away the Cultural Noise
Our most recent discussion revolved around male eldership and essential masculinity. While we debated both liberal and conservative readings of a host of biblical texts, the real traction began when we considered what an elder who treats (not just sees) women and dignified equals. What would it look like in a church for men to not just affirm masculinity in theory but for them to lead and care for women and children around them? How would it change social interaction, leadership, teaching, City Groups, Fight Clubs, and family life? We are challenging one another to a centrist manliness that flows from a deep conviction about how God has made us and a personal commitment to relate to others out of profound love, grace, and godliness.
Before this can truly happen, we observed that men need to clear away a lot of confusing cultural noise regarding how we interact with women so that we can relate to them as people made in God’s image who deserve godly, genuine attention not social disinterest or general disregard. We identified a few ways forward in cultivating deep, centrist masculinity.
- Men need to toss aside the inequality of women depicted in objectified advertising, internet porn, and sex-saturated film.
- Men need to cultivate a deep manliness that overflows in love and care for women through godly deportment and dignifying social interaction.
- Men need to be dependently prayerful, profoundly Scripture saturated, Jesus formed, and others oriented.