Children need to see the best and worst of marriage in order to understand not only the depth of sin but also the luminescent glory of conviction, repentance, grace, reconciliation, and celebration. Otherwise relational darkness will be known but not named. And it will poison the hope of healing. ..Whenever parents fail to grow as human beings, we also refuse that growth opportunity for our children. We cant take our children any farther in life, relationahip, and love that the point we have chose to progress on our own and in our marriages…True redemption involves being struck dumb by the enormity of our failure and then struck even dumber by the enromity of the heart of God that cancels our debt.
~ Dan Allender, How Children Raise Parents, p. 94, 102, 104
Tag: christian parenting
The Joys and Challenges of Parenting
If you are parent, you probably clicked on this post right away. There’s something about being a parent that is both uniquely joy-giving and challenging. As a result, we often look for honest, life-giving stories to help us grow into our parenthood. As I grow with my two kids, I am steadily challenged to rely on God and his wisdom in raising children that are neither spoiled not straight-jacketed. Above all, I desire that my precious little sinners come to delight in all that God is for them in the Son and the Spirit. I am soberly aware that I can be both a hindrance and a help in this aim.
It was out of my struggles in parenting infants that I wrote much of “Becoming A Parent: Facing your Fears and Frustrations.” As my children grow, new challenges and joys emerge. Their facility with language brings us to tears of laughter. I think of my son’s recent cry, “Daddy, get my dirties off, get my dirties off” referring to his need to take a bath. Of course there are the moments of iron-hard resistance to anything we say; the flaring of the human will to chart his or her own course. Discipline is always hard, especially doing it from the right motives.
At this new stage of parenting, I’m considering writing another article, one like, “Becoming A Parent,” that helped me work through how my children were raising me, as well as how I am to raise my children. So, I thought I’d put a request out, to see what some of my fellow parents would appreciate reading. What topics might be of interest to you?
This Is No Fairy Tale
We read This is No Fairy Tale children’s book to our son once or twice a week. It is among the best I’ve come across. In fact, I read some excerpts from it to a group last night and people seemed to really like it.
Dale alternates between what the fairy tale version of the Jesus story would be and the biblical version. For example:
If this were a fairly tale, the young prince Jesus would have been taught to rule over people so that when he grew up, he would become their king.
The truth is, Jesus learned to work hard with his hands. His father taught him how to make things for people out of wood.
Dale Tolmasoff also happens to be a friend. His big heart and a deep love for God and others really come through in this book. The book concludes with a delightfully simple, Christian Hedonistic phrase (you’ll have to read it to find out!). Fittingly, the book’s forward is by John Piper.